I don’t know about you, but if I was Sum 41 vocalist Deryck Whibley (aka Mr. Avril Lavigne), the last thing I would do would be to dress up like a vacationing Freddy Krueger while walking hand in hand with someone who looks and acts like a twelve-year-old. Especially if that supposed twelve-year-old weighed a whole lot more than me and I was already fighting an 8 mph crosswind coming across the parking lot. Because if you couple those odds with a few drunken fathers stumbling out of Chili’s, you’re looking at a good ol’ fashioned ass-kicking and maybe, if you’re especially lucky, some nice punctured lungs as a souvenir.

Special Note to Deryck Whibley: The safer option here would have been to dress up like Jerry Lee Lewis. No one fucks with that guy. He’s crazy.