Rachel Ray looks as if she’s dressed for the running of the bulls in Pamplona. Which is good since that guy behind her looks like he’s about to gored her in the fat ass. [Which Is Bigger: Rachel Ray’s mouth or ass?]

Watching Jenna Jameson dance is like watching a Jew celebrate the arrival of the Allies. [The Skinny Website]

P. Diddy is P. Single. You’ve been P. Warned. [Hollyscoop]

Katherine Heigl is shooting a new movie in New York City called “27 Dresses”. Or as I like to call it “27 Things I Have To Hide In A Public Storage Unit For About $100 Bucks A Month If I Want To Keep My Wife From Calling Me A Freak”. It’s a working title. [Pop Atlas]

Obvious News Alert Of The Day: Britney Spears is the new Bob Marley. [Hollywood Backwash]

Nicole Richie’s DUI trial starts tomorrow, so plan your day accordingly. May I suggest penciling in at least two hours for laughing and pointing at the television? [Dlisted]

Nicole Richie’s baby may be in danger! I blame the terrorists. They’re a very clever lot who are exceptionally good at disguising themselves as drugs and eating disorders. Seriously, ask the President. He’ll tell ya. [Popbytes]

“Jane” magazine has folded, proving once again that lesbians can’t read. For the love of God, will somebody start a foundation already? This issue needs to be addressed. [Celebrity Nation]

Mariah Carey shows off the clown car of bikinis. [Celebridiot]

And finally, I present to you this clip of Nick Lachey being interviewed via satellite on “Good Day New York”. Be sure to stick around for the part where Nick magically transforms himself into color bars because he’s afraid of the question being asked. A modern day chamelon this guy be.