Seriously, why even wear clothes anymore? [Jessica Simpson Loves Attention]

Want to see what your breakfast looks like partially digested? Then please, by all means, go ahead and check out this picture of Brooke Hogan in a bikini. It’s magicly delicious. [The Skinny Website]

Paris Hilton is going to jail? Damn, I knew I shouldn’t have leased this cave. [Hollywood Backwash]

Amy Winehouse may sign on to play the next Bond girl opposite Daniel Craig. Who’s Amy Winehouse, you ask? Well, remember that pile of clothes you stepped over on your way to work this morning? That’s her. [Buzznet]

At 72, Sophia Loren has the breasts of a fifty-year-old. Hot? You better believe it. [Dlisted]

Ty Pennington was busted for drunk driving over the weekend. Who’s Ty Pennington, you ask? Well, remember that pile of clothes you stepped over on your way to work this morning? That’s Amy Winehouse. Ask her. [Celebridiot]

Usher fires his mother. Wait, you can do that? Why wasn’t I informed? [That Grape Juice]

These pictures of Lindsay Lohan doing cocaine are almost as shocking as those pictures of me doing Lindsay Lohan. Hey, I was drunk; save your judgments for the mirror. [Jordan Is Your Homeboy]

Now that I’ve officially turned down the role, Brad Pitt may be next in line to play He-Man. Good luck, man. [I'm Not Obsessed!]

And finally, for those of you who have no idea who the hell He-Man is, here’s another video of me with my shirt off.