According to Page Six, Madonna is heading back to Malawi this weekend to either adopt another baby or to put her construction experience to good use by overseeing a children’s health-care center. Depends on whom you ask really.

From Page Six:

“She’s going to Africa on Saturday, and on Sunday her family will be one bigger,” our spy predicted. But her rep, Liz Rosenberg, said, “Madonna is going to Africa to continue her work with the Raising Malawi organization. She is overseeing the building of a children’s health-care center. She is absolutely not adopting another baby.”

If I were the country of Malawi right now, I’d be looking at the possibilities of starting a short war so I could quickly initiate a name change before the weekend. Anything to keep Madonna’s plane from landing and then leaving with the baby of some poor couple when they weren’t looking. Sure, it may take tons of black paint and man hours, but according to all those documentaries I’ve seen on legendary anthropologist Harrison Ford, planes tend to fly right over countries that aren’t labeled properly.