I’m betting the moment Anne Hathaway stepped off the plane in Tokyo, someone immediately yelled “Godzilla!” and whipped the entire airport into a panic. Thankfully though – as this photograph suggests – there was at least one levelheaded guy in the crowd who noticed her hooker boots and quickly realized that Godzilla wouldn’t be caught dead in those things.

And it’s because of that guy and his enormous round spectacles that we are looking at a photograph of Anne Hathaway accepting flowers from a woman half her size and not one of her standing in front of a burning skyscraper with an understandable look of “WTF” on her face. They do that with hookers, you know, the Japanese. They give them flowers and treat them like royalty. I know because I’ve seen “Memoirs of a Geisha” eight times.

Ok, I lied. Make that zero times because I’m not gay. I think.