How long before someone builds a Notorious B.I.G. figure to whack the Tupac one? [Dlisted]

Fergie rocks out with curlers in her hair in an effort to draw attention away from her ugly face. Or do I mean her beautiful face? Way to go, Fergie. You got me. [The Green Straw]

Aaron Carter proposes to his brother’s ex-girlfriend and she accepts. Look for Nick Carter to win every family argument from here on out with the phrase, “Yeah, but I’ve had my dick in your wife’s mouth.” [Celebrity Week]

Further proof that Tyra Banks is a villian. She has a moustache. [Best Week Ever]

Vanessa Minnillo can’t wait to get pregnant because she thinks everyone has to be nice to her then. Well, it appears I’m going to be the bearer of bad news once again. [Popbytes]

Katie Holmes is beginning to come out of her coma. [Celebrity Silliness]

Jennifer Garner demonstrates the proper way to get in and out of a car without flashing the vagina. [The Skinny Website]

Lindsay Lohan wants to move to London because she loves Notting Hill. Yeah, I’m pretty sure she means the movie too. [Tabloid Whore]

My prayers have been answered – Cocaine in a can. [Jossip]

Fergie won’t stop talking about her crystal meth addiction. Hey, here’s an idea – why not just write a song about it and be done with it? That’s what I did. Just don’t call it “I’m An Idiot” or I’m suing. [Hotrag.net]