Meg Ryan Orders Chinese Baby
There’s only one thing in this world that celebrities love more than Chinese food and that’s Chinese babies. Not only are they as easy to order as a tub of Moo Goo Gai Pan, but they also never have to be refrigerated and can usually grow up to do the vacuuming one day. [Something that egg roll you’re currently dreaming about could never do - unless, of course, it takes up residence in your hips and you do all the housework.]
There are, however, downsides to ordering your own Chinese baby; the major one being that you usually can’t have them delivered. Just ask Meg Ryan. According to Hollywood.com, she had to fly all the way over to China to pick hers up and even sign some papers in the process. Although personally, I think the people involved just wanted her autograph, but were too afraid to ask. After all, she can be quite the monster sometimes. But, hey, that’s what happens to ya once you’ve been filled to the brim with the angry sperm of Russell Crowe.
From Hollywood.com:
The adoption is scheduled to take place at an American consulate in China, according to OK! sources.
An insider tells the publication, “The consulate will formalize the adoption and grant Meg’s new daughter a visa and a social security number. They will probably be flying back to the U.S. immediately after the process is complete.”
And this, my friends, is exactly how China will take over the world: by allowing its sleeper agents to be adopted by lonely middle-aged actresses with lots of money and lots of time – two things that breed nothing but alcoholism.
And while mommy’s stumbling about downstairs trying to fill her unquenchable thirst for booze, little Mai-Ling will be locked away in her bedroom, tinkering on some newfound invention to destroy the American economy and bring her beloved China into the forefront for good.
Source: [Hollywood.com]
Another fucking Hollywood trend. They are a bunch of lemmings out there.
Comment by Bevvie — January 20, 2006 @ 6:57 pm
Mommy Dearwest
Comment by shane gilreath — January 22, 2006 @ 1:42 am
^ Ha!
Comment by Bevvie — January 22, 2006 @ 6:04 pm
“I will NOT have what she’s having” – er, getting.
Comment by MrsJohnLocke — January 23, 2006 @ 2:49 pm
Wow, it’s like a real live asylum in here.
Please continue…
Comment by Erich von Stroheim — January 24, 2006 @ 8:36 pm
Buying a baby? My daughter is adopted from China and it is the last thing from buying. First of all you do not “pay for the baby” you pay thousands in orphanage fees.
Second, do you know what life is like for abandoned girls in China? They are usually left to die and the lucky ones are found and sent to orphanages. And only 5% of the ones babies in orphanages are put up for adoption. The rest usually end up on the streets.
So you can laugh that she is “buying” a baby while you are sitting on your computer, when there are children literally starving.
You should feel really good about yourselves.
Comment by Alex — January 25, 2006 @ 1:22 am
I agree with Alex.
You people are bastards and should be ashamed of yourselves.
Comment by Erich von Stroheim — January 25, 2006 @ 2:02 pm
I am adopting a daughter from China. I am adopting my daughter out of love. If you would take the time to actually read and educate yourself then you would know that the money spent is not for buying babies. This is not a topic that should be laughed at! How would you like to have to give up your own child or be punished to no end by your goverment if you didn’t? Or better yet have your partner dragged out in the middle of the night for a forced abortion because you did not have the government’s ok to have a child. Stupidity like yours really makes me sad for the whole human race!
Comment by Stephanie — January 25, 2006 @ 8:04 pm
I think the statements made here are very selfish and unjust. People should really pre read statements before printing them because it really hurts those who are really wanting a child and can’t have them. It doesn’t matter where a child comes from as long as you give it all the love and attention the child deserves.
Comment by rebecca — January 26, 2006 @ 12:27 am
This is an ENTERTAINMENT blog. It’s filled with SATIRE ~ Find a new home for your ourage, people, it doesn’t belong here.
Comment by Bevvie — January 26, 2006 @ 10:15 am
I think you are confusing satire with stupidity.
Comment by Shan — January 26, 2006 @ 1:03 pm
Shan~
Your O’Reilly Factor basecall cap is cutting off the blood flow to your brain.
Comment by Bevvie — January 26, 2006 @ 6:49 pm
[...] Damn you, Meg Ryan! Damn you and your little Chinese baby that will one day take over the world and make me really, really sorry for what I just wrote! [...]
Pingback by The Blog You Love To Hate»Blog Archive » Russell Crowe Will Always Be Misunderstood — April 6, 2006 @ 5:54 am
Maybe…
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Comment by Bush — January 11, 2007 @ 7:08 am
[...] Hopefully though, these poor sexually charged souls were not executed for their indiscretions and were allowed to use their hard-earned money to buy her new CD instead of birth control. That would just be awesome for the world. And for Meg Ryan since a bigger selection is always better. [...]
Pingback by The Blog You Love To Hate»Blog Archive » Christina Aguilera Will Never Drown — June 26, 2007 @ 3:39 pm